I got this letter years ago from a friend, and had to post it here. However, given recent events in the news about Indiana and other states passing “religious freedom laws,” I think it takes on more meaning.
For those who don’t know who Dr. Laura was, she dispensed advice in books, a radio show, and a short-lived TV show. She was not a licensed mental health professional, so could not call herself a “therapist”. Instead, she called herself a “shrink.” While she does have a doctorate degree, her degree is in biophysiology. Thus, given her training, she would be on solid ground giving advice about the vitamins you take in the morning, but not about your relationships or values. Nonetheless, she had a large following of religious, conservative people, and she catered to their beliefs and views. She was/is a dangerous media personality, however; she whipped her listeners into a frenzy and manufactured considerable controversy when Dr. Laura attacked the American Psychological Association.
Dr. Laura was particularly critical of gays and lesbians, equating them with child molesters and criminals; thus, the letter is even more entertaining.
Dear Dr. Laura,
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s law. I have learned a great deal from you, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.
When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. How should I deal with this?
I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as it suggests in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
Lev. 25:44 states that I may buy slaves from the nations that are around us. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans but not Canadians. Can you clarify?
I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev. 10:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don’t agree. Can you settle this?
Lev. 20:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging.